The FAQyMe gene


Chapter 224

Child sexual abuse and the destruction of communities


Friday, 22 March 2019 5:41:26 PM

Chapter 224 Child sexual abuse and the destruction of communities

The past few month have highlighted what can only be described as a plague that has infected our communities for generations.

The 'Pell' matter simply brought things to a head for many in our communities. One would have to be wilfully blind or deluded to pretend that the sexual abuse of children in faith based organizations was an aberration rather than a twisted and perverse new normal.

Hardly a day goes by without a historic case being reported by the media. Obviously not all the cases related to the Roman Catholic Church are uniquely Australian, but as the name 'Catholic' indicates, they are universal and they touch each and everyone of us.

I doubt that there are many readers of my FB wall that have not been impacted either directly or indirectly by cases of sexual abuse of children. Children either abused whilst in care of faith based organizations or in care of those trusted by their parents, their families.

Often the abusers were either seen as part of the family / community structure or were in fact related to the children concerned.

In all cases, as far as I have learned over many years, this has involved both grooming and frightening as it sounds, the very tacit or complicit behavior of those who should have been expected to act in the best interest of the child.

Volumes have been written about 'stranger danger' and the threat posed by external forces. Yet it seems to me at this point in time that the real danger to children came in the guise of respected members of the community and as far as I can tell, these always involved a degree of power imbalance between the perpetrator and the child and its family.

In fact, there are times when it is hard to tell the difference between the two. Churches have historically been seen as agents of spiritual and religious growth. As such clergy and laity were allowed both into the physical proximity of children and certainly into the inner reaches of the child's mind.

Were these positive things then I might accept that there is a role for this. But the overwhelming evidence, the case after case presented, the body of evidence presented to the Royal Commission into the abuse of children in faith based organizations makes it clear that the impacts have been far from benevolent. In fact they have undermined communities and destroyed individuals.

We, as a society, accepted a redress scheme that allowed predatory organizations to hide the incidents of assault and abuse by the planned use of confidentiality agreements.

It is interesting to note that in 1922 the Vatican changed its approach to crimes against children by concealing the facts on pain of excommunication, a punishment that was to be applied to any of the faithful who allowed knowledge of the crimes committed to become public knowledge. This too is part of the evidence given to the Royal Commission here in Australia.

My point though is that children were not only sexually abused in churches, it occurred in other organizations and certainly within family structures. All the places that were thought to be safe were in fact compromised and following the lead of the Roman Catholic Church, the model applied was one of pastoral care and treatment of the offenders and more often than not the victim became secondary to the rage of saving the predators and the reputations of organizations and families.

I write this today thinking of all the survivors that I have met over the years. I write this knowing now that many of them were denied the opportunity for a happy and productive life, I write this knowing now that they did complain when they were young. That often the troubled behavior that they displayed was a cry for help that we as a community did not hear or chose not to hear.

The lies and deception, the vested interests and power imbalances that enabled and protected predators still exist.

I know what it says about the Roman Catholic Church and I know what it says about churches in general. To me it places the burden of responsibility fairly onto the leaders of the church and those organizations that were trusted with the souls of the innocent.

It also says a lot about our society, our culture and how this abuse was permitted to occur for generations. It says something about the power and control that churches exercised over the minds of the faithful but it also speaks volumes about the families who knew about the abuse and remained silent as they were promised both a physical reward in this life and one for the life eternal.

It says much about a culture that decried the child sacrifice mentioned in the old Testament and yet was prepared to see children belonging to less powerful economic and social groups as the less worthy, the 'wardies', the orphans and the bastards born out of wedlock.

These are hard and painful words but it pains me to know that such language was used in my lifetime. It pains me to know that a large body of work dedicated to preventing child abuse is now tainted, either by association or by it being the product of wilful misdirection and of created ignorance.

I cannot look into the eyes of the many survivors that I have gotten to know over the years and offer the platitude of "I feel your pain". I am grateful not to know that level of pain, to have grown up relatively unscathed by the machinations of those who saw no issue with using children for personal gratification. I am thankful that I was not trafficked by my family to ensure economic success or to obtain favours.

I can say that your words haunt me, that the betrayal that you suffered disgusts me and that your stories have changed my view of society for ever. I have learned that to prevent a repeat of the horrors of the past, to end the horrors of today will require vigilance and dedication by every member of the community. It will require the rebuilding of trust and safe spaces and above all, it will require a level of ruthlessness in dealing with predators that may appear to be in conflict with the pastoral care and treatment model offered to date to the many criminals who preyed on our children.

It requires a paradigm shift in our communities and cultures, one that acknowledges the rights of the child well above the rights of any organization, no matter what claims it makes.

It will require us, as a community to value parenting and mentoring far above the sperm deposit and ownership of a child response.

Children are not property, their value must not be determined by class or by economic worth.

Above all, it will require all of us to act as parents if called upon and if we choose to respond to the call.

It requires boundaries that are easily understood and that are enforced if they are breached.

Every child has the right to know itself in a safe space. It is our duty to ensure that we, the adults, take reasonable steps to ensure that all children are safe. That all organizations are accountable and above all, transparent.

That we act as parents, uncles and aunties and mentors to all children and that parents who are struggling can reach out for support and guidance without being treated as flawed.

That the rights of the child are paramount simply because that child will one day be called on to be a force for good in its own life and the lives of others, that healthy and functional communities raise healthy and functional children.

Let us not repeat the historic failure of the recent past nor continue to hide the truths of child sexual abuse.

The violent society that we live in represents the violence and abuse that children were subjected to. Get your head around the scale of the thing before you pontificate on the goodness of churches.

AK

.

Divider - dont forget to donate so we can keep on with education to protect children - hope you benefitted from reading this

The FAQyMe Gene & the lifelong search for safe, moral and ethical social justice, the Human Right to a trauma informed and evidence based recovery and social re-engagement unhindered by the fear, anger, blockages or projections from other people's gods

The best advice I can give with regard to recovery from trauma is to explore your attachments and/or other relationship vulnerabilities safely with evidence based trauma informed specialists or you can privately Learn the Science of Healthy Attachment Relationships in a safe, low cost self timed manner.

*I have no financial connection nor do I receive any reward for promoting effective treatment other than knowing that others can and do benefit greatly from them as I have.

I was fortunate enough to have obtained the services of Dr Julian Lim when he was working in my city but unfortunately we lost connection for a while. Reconnecting with an experienced and well qualified trauma informed evidence based professional making him the safest and the most knowledgeable I have engaged with and this has been transformational for me. Dr Lim has my full and confident recommendation. Dr Julian Lim

JohnB

.

Divider - dont forget to donate so we can keep on with education to protect children - hope you benefitted from reading this

Recently published :
      Chapter 240 Can you be a slave today in Australia?
      Chapter 239 Discussing the book: PREDATORS' PARADISE: A Journey of Survival and Resilience by Glen Fisher with Kate Shayler
      Chapter 238 YouTube Update
      Chapter 237 Redefining redress - systemic failings continue
      Chapter 226 What is the real extent of the Catholic cover up?
      Chapter 225 Where do you fit with regard to this official federal police religious test?

The FAQyMe Gene & the lifelong search for safe, moral and ethical social justice, the Human Right to a trauma informed and evidence based recovery and social re-engagement unhindered by the fear, anger, blockages or projections from other people's gods - #CoverUpDay737,632

.

Divider - dont forget to donate so we can keep on with education to protect children - hope you benefitted from reading this

You can donate via the buy button

APRIL 3 2019 - 5:30PM - Clergy sex abuse survivor Paul Levey sues Catholic Church and includes why many survivors do not seek compensation via politicians, police or the criminal justice system. You can read Paul's first public statement about his experience which was first published here in 2016 For those who don't know my story here it is. Paul Levey Paul thumbed the entire document on his mobile one letter at a time.

John Brown was born in Yea Victoria 3717 on 27 December, 1948. John grew up in Yea, he went to the Catholic school on The Parade Yea and then a final year at Yea High school in Station Street. He undertook an apprenticeship as a Hand and Machine Compositor/Linotype Mechanic at the local newspaper The Yea Chronicle who recently declined to publish John's story. John left Yea after realising that the proprietor and local policeman Bill Ellison along with other local Catholics in his hometown and surrounds at that time were well aware of his abuse and of the rape and abuse of other children in Yea and district and were aware of the many events surrounding the murder of Herbert Henry Kemp of Yea ...... read more and more and more and Site Map

Investigation of an unsolved murder in 1962 can no longer be investigated according to police taskforce SANO because a different pedophile Catholic clergyman who raped a child at age 8 is now dead. As a result of the dead rapist being unconnected with the murder Victorian police remain clue less.

Later in life John married in Toowoomba only to begin the most bizarre period in his life as he learned that he wasnow related by marriage to the then bishop of Toowoomba Bill Morris. Morris was the head of the bishops conference at that time and was the "Go to" person in the country for survivors of childhood sexual abuse by Catholic clergy and yet I was never able to get a time or a conversation with the bishop. I did get conversations or connection with a number of Catholic organisations with varying degrees of weirdness some of which I have written about in my blog The FAQyMe Gene & the lifelong search for safe, moral and ethical social justice, the Human Right to a trauma informed and evidence based recovery and social re-engagement unhindered by the fear, anger, blockages or projections from other people's gods .

John is author and publisher of Trauma in Religion and regularly blogs at The FAQyMe Gene on his journey, recovery and the horror and the scale of this global issue.

John's personal story is just another from the hundreds of millions of other stories across the globe eminating from the human rights abuses and ongoing horrors of the systemic rape, abuses of trust, fraud, deception and cover up in the global Catholic and other religions. Like those others his "issues in life" arose and remain simply because his abusers as a child were just like theirs in that their rapists and abusers were Catholic or Catholic or Christian clergy and they too remain ineligible or unable to have their human rights upheld in their lifetime..

Copyright The FAQyMe Gene © 2019. Site Map